The Mars and Venus syndrome

Before I read an article which, I, almost have reproduced here, I really had no idea of the phrase, "Men are from Mars and women are from Venus!".

Read on to know what's the matter!  

MEN THINK IN BOXES AND WOMEN IN CONTINUUM: A woman experiences life as a continuum where every moment is connected. Therefore when she encounters a conflict in a relationship, a woman wants to stay and talk about it. When she is not listened to, she does not feel valued. She cannot move from one problem to another experience without the earlier one being resolved. In contrast, men think in boxes. It is like they have opened one box this moment, closed it the next minute and opened another.

RECOUNTING PAIN: When you share a painful experience, a woman may also share a similar experience that she has had. Her thought in sharing the experience is to convey that she understands the pain. A man will also narrate his experience in a similar situation but his focus and pride will be on how quickly he got out of the pain.

MEN TALK IN GENERAL AND WOMEN IN DETAILS: When you ask a man how he feels, he may give a vague answer and say that there are some difficulties. He is looking for solutions and wants to be left alone till he finds a way out. Whereas, a woman will want to share in detail how she feels, what made her feel that way etc. She dwells on the experience and expects her partner to be listen.

Men look at moving out of an experience quickly and finding solutions. This is to avoid feeling vulnerable when encountering conflicts. Women want to express their vulnerabilities and be understood. They want to be listened to, and given attention when they are sharing their experience.

Knowing such information helps in understanding the difference between the nature of men and women. The responses, which are the basis of complaints like the one given at the column’s beginning, are not to be looked at as against each other, but part of one’s nature.

Courtesy: TheNewInianExpress

Change the World by Changing Me

The Sufi Bayazid says this about himself: “I was a revolutionary when I was young and all my prayer to God was: ‘Lord, give

me the energy to change the world.’ " 

“As I approached middle age and realised that half my life was gone without my

changing a single soul, I changed my prayer to: ‘Lord, give me the grace to change all those who come in contact with me. Just my family and friends,

and I shall be content.’ ” 

“Now that I am an old man and my days are numbered, my one prayer is: ‘Lord,

give me the grace to change myself.’ If I had prayed for this right from

the start I should not have wasted my life.”

SOURCE : “THE SONG OF THE BIRD” ANTHONY DE MELLO, S.

Are You Suffering From Nomophobia???! Well! 'm not!

Nomophobia is the fear of being out of mobile phone contact. The term, an abbreviation for "no-mobile-phone phobia", was coined during a study by the UK Post Office who commissioned YouGov, a UK-based research organization to look at anxieties suffered by mobile phone users. 
"It’s not real until a TV news organization throws a label on it. Nomophobia, according to MSNBC, is the fear of being without your mobile phone, and wouldn’t you know it, it’s on the rise.
The story says that cellphone use is either a healthy way of staying connected or a dangerous obsession. According to a survey cited in the story, 66 percent of people responded with a fear of being without their mobile phones.
The story cites a few particularly sad cases, including a woman who even takes her phone to bed with her (my phone has my alarm on it, so I do this too). She says that she only has real conversations with her child over Facebook and the phone (an improvement over the classic parenting problem of barely talking to your kids at all). She takes it to the shower, she takes it to the bathroom, and reading this article is meant to make you feel that you’re just like her.
It’s hard to pin this on the device itself, though. For me, it’s more the knowledge that I deal with people in different time zones, that speed is essential to my job, and I want to know what people have to say to me, when they say it. It’s a symptom of the oft-cited interconnected world of which I, as a blogger, have become an unwitting apostle. It’s also a nervous tic – don’t know what to do with your hands, check your phone.
Nomophobia is an example of displacing blame onto technology. Blame the phone, not the anxiety or obsessive disorders that make you feel compelled to check it all the time. Phones have a way of bringing out the worst in people like the woman in the article, or me. But in the end, it’s all just a reflection of your own problems." SIC FORBES

Maybe it is wrong to call this a phobia.
For a phobia is generally an 'irrational fear', and that pang of anxiety when you are without your mobile in this brave new connected world is perhaps an understandable feeling.
But either way, for 66 per cent of us, being with your phone at all times is an obsession that occupies every waking minute.
If you think you may suffer from nomophobia - or 'no mobile phone phobia' - then the warning signs are:

• An inability to ever turn your phone off
• Obsessively checking for missed calls, emails and texts
• Constantly topping up your battery life
• Being unable to pop to the bathroom without taking your phone in with you.

The number of people afflicted with nomophobia was revealed in a study by SecurEnvoy, and shows a rise from a similar study four years ago, where 53 per cent of people admitted the fear of losing their phone.
In the latest study, of the 1,000 people surveyed in the UK, 66 percent said they felt the fear.
Young adults - aged between 18 and 24 - tended to be the most addicted to their mobile phones, with 77 per cent unable to stay apart for more than a few minutes, and those aged 25 to 34 followed at 68 per cent.